Written by Ilfa

I’m all alone, in these four walls and not
Upset, happy, angry, sad, nothing at all
Anticipation and fear as I revisit this after

 

Five, six, nine, ten years
Seeing that version of myself, helpless and not
As you gleefully rub your hands in the back of my mind,
I scream out from the future to that past

 

Please don’t, don’t, don’t,
This will shatter me later, make me fear, even as I become better
Nightmares are what my dreams are made of

 

But you don’t stop…. don’t stop, there’s no stopping you
Beg you, plead with you, “please…please…please
But you can’t hear me and I can’t hear me either

 

And I struggle to comprehend and care
Why you put the burden of your release on me, on me, on me, in me…
Has it really been five, six, nine, ten years?

 

What made you think that I’d like your form of torture?
Did you give it any thought, thought before you acted?
After all, how many little girls dream of happily never afters?

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